Tentang Kehilangan

2011 mungkin bukan tahun yang bersahabat. Dalam stengah tahun terakhir ini gw udah merasakan kehilangan 2 kali. Bukan kehilangan barang atau uang, tapi orang-orang yang sangat gw sayang. First, my (ex)bf. Bukan kehilangan dalam arti yang sebenarnya, cuma sama-sama mengambil keputusan untuk jalan sendiri-sendiri. Beda prioritas. I felt down. Orang yang bener2 berarti buat gw. Tempat gw curhat, berbagi suka ma sedih, my everything. Sekarang udah beda. But time will heal all wound. Semoga dia bisa dapet yang terbaik, karir dan hal yang lain. We're still friend. I don't know what will happen tomorrow, tapi gw rela demi yang terbaik buat sama2. Mungkin, akan ada kejutan lain. Who knows..

Then, my lovely grandfather. He passed away on his 93rd birthday (15.7.1918 - 15.7.2011). I love him. Mulai sekarang ga ada lagi kung2 yang tiap minggu gw dateng bakalan nungguin d depan dengan senyuman dan jabat tangannya. Ga ada yang sibuk cari makanan di kulkas buat cucu2nya. Ga ada yang suka ambil2in makanan pas makan siang. Orang yang duduk di sebelah kanan gw pas makan siang juga bakal beda. Ga ada lagi yang simpenin dan kasih gw koran mandarin tiap minggu. Kung2 yang baik banget. T___T. Tapi gw percaya kung2 jauh lebih seneng disana sama Bapa. Hidup 93 tahun juga bukan hal yang mudah. Temen2nya udah pergi duluan, penyakit tua udah bikin komunikasi terbatas. Selamat jalan Kung2. Depi sayang kung2.

Banyak banget hal yang gabisa diungkapin satu2 mengenai kedua orang diatas. Let it stay in my heart as long as i life. Mereka udah punya bagian sendiri dalam hati gw. Gabisa digantiin sekalipun mungkin akan ada orang lain yang masuk dalam hidup gw. Thanks udah buat hidup gw sangat berwarna.Gw sayang banget sama kalian. =)

Confuse

Well, yeah..Somethings make me confuse..

First of all, my GPA for this term..It's really out of my expectation..Grrr..I always say "Never expect something cause expectation hurts" and "Never regret cause either u've tried the best on it or u've not at all". But they don't really fit at all situation. The realities are, I try quite hard, I can do it well, I'm sure to get a worth score but in fact I don't. So sad. :( But life must go on. Try harder next (hope for the last too) term. Show the world I can beat the perfect score for the second times. Cause I got it at 4th term that most of student say "hell term". Hahahaha (a little bit arrogant). Yes this my promise, I'll try the best and let God do the rest. =)

Then, a classic opinion, what do they say? About I'm not a kind or not friendly or or not nice or jutek girl?? The only thing I want to yell at them is "IF U DON"T KNOW ME, DON'T JUDGE!!!" (Errr, okay is that proofing me that I was? LOL!) I can understand and don't really care about if the people who said that doesn't know me at all. But, the fact is she/he know me, we're friends, partners, and still said that they don't feel comfort to tell or talk to me about something. Owh please! -.-" Okay, maybe that's remind me to be nicer to everyone. I will. And don't forget to smile =). Cause smile is a universal language. Everybody know its meaning. And PEACE BEGINS WITH A SMILE =)

I think that all for this time. See ya! =)

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I LOVE gloomy day. Cause shiny day has never been so real lately. I just see the sun but I don't feel its warmth.

I LOVE rain. Cause no one can see me crying in the rain. It's not the tears I've cried that makes it so hard. But the small piece of hope left inside my heart, May I get back my sunshine?

Now, the only thing standing in between me and the lost sunshine is reality. I believe it will be okay in the end, if it isn't it couldn't be the end.

And the last but not the least

I LOVE you, sunshine. Cause..... No reason. I just do.

I'll wait.